The trees hold secrets.
Their roots beneath my feet, beneath the earth. That is where the truth is held. It’s the quiet whispers you can only hear when you stop to stand among the trees, among God’s greatest creation.
How little I was beneath the shade of those trees. Crying out and lifting my hands while I worshiped in praise for a God like no other. Oh, how I’ve seen the beauty of the darkness, the fox who wanders at night looking back at me, right in my eyes, as if to have encountered a stranger whose presence is both familiar and foreign.
What is the significance of the midnight fox? I’ve never seen the Milky Way in person like I did on that mountain. I both surrendered myself and found a version of myself I had long forgotten about. I’d lost my wild, but the Forrest and the trees returned it to me. The mountains have a way of stripping us from what we no longer need and gifting us a chance to explore beyond the ridge line, disconnected from the rest of the world, left with only the sound of our voice for comfort.
The rain came after the winds howled, and the lightning danced throughout the night sky. The sound of thunder woke me from a dead sleep and I couldn’t help but feel so incredibly vulnerable with each punching sound of thunder that rang in my ears. It felt like the voice of God himself was just on the other side of that flimsy zipper separating me from the wild things. I’ll never look at thunder and lightning in the same way again.
Up there, I was free. Down here, I must fight to hold onto that freedom I have earned my right to claim. I climbed so high the very breath within me, the life force that sustains me, took my air away. It disoriented me with its headache, nausea and confusion. You know you’ve reached the top of something remarkable when even your breath, like the trees, fights to remain in its space.
But it is the wisdom of the walk I will most cherish. The precision with which each step is carefully planned, one and then another, never rushed, yet completely deliberate. It’s the signals my body gives me that demand my attention. Those signals I have struggled for years to understand how to tame. They are truly the wild within me. And as I’ve come to the end of the almost 18 miles I’ve walked, I’m left with only one absolute. The sound of the twigs that break beneath my feet gently reminds me that deep within those mountains lay the secrets of the trees. Secrets I intend on keeping to myself.
Words by Luz Helena Thompson | Huts for Vets, Women’s Trip, July 2023